‘Get Up Early to Prep’: MIL Demands Working DIL Cook Thanksgiving Before 12-Hour Shift
It’s one of the first rules of etiquette we learn: when you are a guest in someone else’s home, you do not make demands. You arrive with a smile, perhaps a small gift, and you certainly don’t dictate the menu, especially when your host is already going out of their way. You are there to enjoy their company, not to add to their burdens.
However, one woman recently took to the internet to share a story that proves not everyone follows these simple rules of decency. Her tale of a mother-in-law with some truly astonishing expectations for Thanksgiving dinner has left thousands of people shaking their heads in disbelief.
The Incident
The story began simply enough. A woman, who works a demanding job, agreed to host her husband’s parents for Thanksgiving. Since they live far away, she and her husband were happy to open their home for the holiday visit. But the pleasantries ended there.
The mother-in-law called not to ask how she could help, but to inquire if it would be “a burden cooking for 4 instead of 2.” The woman calmly explained that she wouldn’t be cooking at all, as she was scheduled to work a full 12-hour shift, from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m., on Thanksgiving Day. She offered perfectly reasonable solutions: they could order a lovely catered meal or all go out to a nice restaurant together.
This suggestion was met with fury. The mother-in-law was aghast, exclaiming that they couldn’t possibly go out “ON A FAMILY HOLIDAY!!!!!” The woman noted the irony, sharing that her in-laws had stopped celebrating all family holidays and birthdays years ago, but suddenly this one was sacred.
The situation escalated when the mother-in-law and father-in-law called back together. This time, they came with a plan—for her. The mother-in-law insisted she “prioritize a meal,” suggesting she “get up early to prep things, set the rolls out to rise, and put things in crock pots before work.” Then, the moment she walked in the door after her exhausting shift, she could “finish cooking and we could eat at 7:30.”
When the woman asked what her husband (who had the day off) and his parents would be doing all day, the mother-in-law’s response was the final straw. She offered that she could “check on things and make sure nothing got burned.” Thankfully, the woman’s husband overheard the conversation, stepped in, and saved the day with a stroke of genius, turning the tables on his mother completely.
The Internet Reacts
Online, readers were appalled by the mother-in-law’s audacity and rallied around the hardworking woman. The reactions quickly sorted into a few distinct camps.
Camp 1: The “Absolutely Not” Crowd
Most commenters were simply stunned by the sheer nerve of the in-laws. They couldn’t fathom asking a host, let alone one working such a long day, to prepare a feast. The mother-in-law’s proposed schedule was seen as particularly outrageous.
One user wrote, “OMG, this is literally insane. What is she thinking?!?” Another pointed out the absurdity of the timeline, asking, “Like you already have a 6am start. How much earlier did she expect you to get up for?”
Camp 2: The Great Husband Debate
The husband’s clever intervention became a major topic of discussion. Seeing his wife’s distress, he took the phone and told his mother how much he missed her cooking and asked if she would teach him her recipes. She was thrilled, and they immediately began planning the Thanksgiving menu that they would cook together.
Many praised him as a hero. “He played his mother like a fiddle, that’s what we like to see,” one person cheered. Another added, “FINALLY!!!! A husband that ACTUALLY loves his wife.”
However, a smaller group felt he had only appeased his mother rather than confronting her bad behavior. One skeptic commented, “Your husband didn’t really protect you here, he just appeased his mother.” Another agreed, saying, “His mother was attention seeking and he gave her attention. That sounds as much like appeasement as anything else.”
Camp 3: The “Here’s What I Would Have Done” Crowd
Of course, many readers offered their own advice for handling such a situation, ranging from practical to pointed. One person suggested a sharp, witty comeback for the next time her role as the family breadwinner was ignored: “‘Being the bread winner of the family, I’m surprised you expect me to also be the home maker.'”
Others advised the woman to protect her peace during the visit. “Don’t rush home from work that day!!!” one commenter urged. Another warned her to be prepared for passive-aggressive remarks and to have her husband ready to shut them down.
The Etiquette Verdict
Let’s be perfectly clear: the mother-in-law’s behavior was completely out of line. A guest’s primary responsibility is to be gracious and considerate of their host’s situation. To not only expect a full-blown holiday meal but to dictate how and when the host should prepare it—especially around a grueling work schedule—is a shocking breach of etiquette. It shows a profound lack of respect and empathy.
The golden rule of being a houseguest is simple: adapt to the home you are in. If your host says they are not cooking, you either offer to cook yourself or you happily agree to their alternative plans. You do not, under any circumstances, demand they sacrifice their well-being for your ideal version of a holiday.
The Call to Action
So, what do you think? Was the husband’s solution a stroke of genius that saved the holiday, or did he simply appease his mother’s demanding behavior?
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