I Was Supposed To Practice Adult Life, But My Parents Wouldn’t Let Me Choose Lunch

Most of us grew up hearing the phrase “waste not, want not,” a timeless principle that shapes how we approach everything from clearing our dinner plates to storing leftovers for tomorrow’s meal. It reflects a deep sense of respect—for the food itself, for whoever made it possible, and for our own hard-earned resources.

That said, a young woman recently posted a story online that truly challenges this age-old wisdom, raising a genuinely difficult question: what do you do when someone insists on giving you food you never asked for in the first place?

The Incident

It all started when a 17-year-old’s parents traveled abroad for an extended trip. They presented it as a test drive for grown-up life, an opportunity for her to figure out independent living before she left for university. She was expected to prepare her own breakfast and dinner—a perfectly sensible step on the path to self-sufficiency. But when it came to lunch, her parents had an oddly specific arrangement.

They set up a daily meal delivery from a nearby restaurant. Their reasoning was puzzling: they believed she lacked the skills to make lunch herself, despite the fact that she was already managing two other meals with zero prior experience. Trouble started from day one. She didn’t enjoy the food, and the servings were excessively large, with “half of the rice being wasted and thrown out.”

She brought up the problems with her parents multiple times. They said they’d addressed it with the restaurant, but absolutely nothing improved. After enduring two full weeks of unwanted, oversized portions, she’d had enough. Her mother appeared to sympathize, agreeing that she should be free to purchase meals elsewhere.

Her father, on the other hand, was an entirely different matter. He flat-out refused to end the arrangement and made a jaw-dropping suggestion: “talk to the restaurant, if they don’t listen feed the food to the dogs in the streets.” Feeling thoroughly ignored, the teenager started turning down the deliveries altogether, hoping the resulting waste would finally compel her father to pay attention.

The Internet Reacts

When she turned to the internet to ask whether she was in the wrong for her act of protest, opinions were sharply divided, with readers falling into a few clear-cut groups.

The first was the “Absolutely Not” contingent, who were outraged on the teen’s behalf. They viewed her father’s behavior as utterly unreasonable and controlling. One commenter summed it up bluntly: “The restaurant is an AH and your dad is an AH for trying to make you eat it.”

A different user homed in on the bizarre logic behind the parents’ arrangement, noting, “So you can cook breakfast and dinner, but don’t have experience to cook lunch? What? This is weird to me and a little controlling.” These readers believed the teen was entirely justified in pushing back against such an absurd situation.

Next came the “Devil’s Advocate” group, who thought the young woman was being unappreciative and wasteful. Their argument was that having meals delivered was a privilege she ought to be thankful for. “Be grateful you have parents willing to pay for restaurant food for you to eat while they’re away,” one person scolded.

Someone else chimed in, “I wish my parents did that for me and I’m 37 and married!” To these commenters, letting perfectly good food go to waste, no matter the circumstances, was simply inexcusable.

Lastly, a third faction offered “Practical Solutions,” proposing alternative approaches the teen could have taken. They acknowledged the frustration but felt there were smarter ways to deal with the situation than simply discarding the food. “Too much rice from lunch? Heat it up and eat it as part of your dinner,” one commenter recommended, adding, “Leftover rice is great for fried rice!”

Someone else wondered whether she could pass the food along to another person, pointing out, “There’s no sense in it going to waste if somebody else would appreciate it.”

The Etiquette Verdict

Although wasting food is never a good look, the true etiquette violation here falls squarely on the father. His intentions may have originally come from a caring place, but his unwillingness to hear his daughter’s perfectly valid concerns is where everything fell apart. His advice to “feed the food to the dogs” reveals a remarkable disregard for his daughter’s voice, his own money, and the food itself.

This goes beyond a simple plate of rice; it’s fundamentally about control and a breakdown in communication. Proper manners require that you listen to the people around you, particularly when your decisions directly impact them. Pushing someone into a situation where they feel a silent protest is their only recourse is a parenting shortcoming, not a deficit in a child’s gratitude.

Your Thoughts

Where do you stand on this family dispute? Was the teenager an ungrateful brat for letting the food go to waste, or was her father’s obstinance the true issue at play?